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Want your partner to be healthier? Lead by example.

Posted on March 17, 2023March 17, 2023 by firdaus


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Could your partner use a little push to live a healthier lifestyle? As a personal trainer, I’m often asked for subtle ways to motivate a family member or spouse to eat better or exercise more. It can be an uncomfortable topic to broach, and good intentions can easily be misinterpreted.

We know the many physical and mental benefits of exercise and healthy eating, but no one wants to be preached to about it.

Try these tips:

Make it a team effort

One of the biggest factors influencing exercise adherence is comradery. Make exercise about working as a team toward a common goal. Cheer each other on, establish accountability, and celebrate each success along the way.

Start small

Setting lofty goals usually ends in disappointment when you miss the mark.

For example, if your partner is new to cardio exercise, keep these workouts low in intensity. People don’t want to feel as if they’re struggling to catch up, that they are too winded to chat, or overly sore the next day. Save harder efforts for when you’re further along in your program together.

Be patient

Everyone’s endurance level is different. If you’ve been exercising for years, don’t expect your new workout buddy to start at the same pace. Be encouraging and congratulate the person along the way. This will help build confidence, motivation, and adherence, and it will make it more fun. These are foundational pillars for building long-term workout success.

Be consistent

For exercise to be effective, you must perform it often. Make it your goal to exercise at least three times a week. Pick the same days so it becomes ingrained in your schedule.

Play to emotions

Rather than make exercise about looking good, focus on what’s more valuable: how it makes you feel good. When you suggest an after-dinner walk, position it as a chance to spend time together instead of a way to lose weight.

Similarly, if your partner wants to be a couch potato after a long workweek, suggest a fun family activity. Outings such as walking the dog or strolling around a museum are great ways to improve your health without it feeling much like exercise at all.

Be a good example

For better or worse, partners influence each other’s health habits. And behaviors can be contagious. When you live with someone and spend ample time together, your routines will inevitably affect, and even mirror, each other’s. This includes eating the same meals and partaking in shared activities.

So if one person is eating fatty foods or avoiding working out, it’s easy to fall into these habits, too. But if you can lead by example, you can slowly influence your partner’s behaviors. Keep all things health-related positive, as optimism is contagious, too.

Ashley Blake Greenblatt is a certified personal trainer and wellness coach in South Jersey. Learn more about her virtual training program at ashleyblakefitness.com.

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